Showing posts from September, 2009

Surrender or Submitting: To commit to the consideration or judgment of another...

"I" or "Me” thinking is what we as individuals bring to our relationship. It is our independent selfish way of thinking. We are not stating that it is a bad way of thinking, works ok for single life but can bring ‘issues’ to a two person relationship. We transition from “I” to “We” by putting the needs of the relationship a head of our individual needs. Remember when the relationship wins you as an individual win.
Think about the marriage first and surrendering will become easier. Since men and women have different needs they surrender differently. Surrendering comes from the unconditional love of each partner.
Our values and our upbringing are ours and in most cases different from our partners this is the cause of many of the struggles in the relationship. Give the relationship a set of values and make the relationship a priority and surrendering will be come natural.That you love your partner enough to yield your “I”ndividual desires for the “We” commitment. To yield …

The Casket Dropped–Profile of a True Marriage

by Harriet HairstonPatrick Swayze and Lisa Niemi were neither black, nor did they have kids, but their marriage exemplifies just about everything a loving relationship should entail. Upon hearing of Mr. Swayze’s death, so many stories arose about his life and accomplishments. Most of the time, you find that a person is just as inept in their personal lives as they are successful in their professional endeavors. Yet in the case of Mr. Swayze and his wife Lisa Niemi, I found that they had their cake and were able to eat it, too…all the way until his casket dropped.They had:Longevity: They met when she was 16 years old and a dance student of his mother’s. They were married three years later on June 12, 1975. My own parents were married on July 5, 1975, so I wasn’t even thought of then!Friendship: He stated that “we were friends for a long time before we became lovers. We even lived and slept togther for a year before we had sex. That wasn’t easy.” I’m sure it wasn’t, but after …


Arguments between spouses accomplish a lot…most of it destructive. Yet, many couples find themselves caught in a vicious cycle of rehashing the same fights over and over. Often this causes one or both of the individuals to withdraw in order to avoid the pain and anger involved.
Overtime, communication breaks down and really serious problems may crop up in the marriage.

The problem with arguments is that they are thought of as contests. Someone must win and someone must lose. But, when there is a winner and loser…both the husband and wife lose because someone is going to feel defeated and resentful.
There is another way.
By learning some basic conflict resolution techniques, couples can put aside the need to “win” an argument and instead learn resolve their disputes in a manner acceptable to both parties. It is possible to learn conflict resolution just as it is possible to learn anything else.

The key to conflict resolution is not …

Returns from investing in your marriage, ….PRICELESS.

EVERY relationship has a cycle. In the beginning, you fell in love with your spouse. You anticipated their call, wanted their touch, and liked their idiosyncrasies.

Falling in love with your spouse wasn't hard. In fact, it was a completely spontaneous experience. You didn't have to DO anything.
That's why it's called "falling" in love - because it's happening TO YOU.

People in love sometimes say, "I was swept off my feet." Think about the imagery of that expression. It implies that you were just standing there; doing nothing, and then something came along and happened to you. Falling in love is easy. It's a passive and spontaneous experience.

But after a few years of marriage, the euphoria of love fades.
It's the natural cycle of every relationship. Slowly but surely, phone calls become a bother (if they come at all), touch is not always welcome (when it happens), and your spouse's idiosyncrasies,…

Whyte’s Bio

Marcus and Gloria Whyte is a happily committed married unit of more than 22 years. They are the proud parents of 2 teenaged children; Franklin 18 and India 16.
Lifelong residents of Akron, Ohio, the Whyte’s believe that service to others is the center focus of their ministry. Marcus and Gloria are committed to mentoring couples who are looking for assistance in growing and strengthening their relationship.
The Whyte’s bring a strong background of organizational and consulting skills to the table. These skills are influenced from the Whyte’s vast knowledge in the computer operations and the information technologies area.

Marcus and Gloria are the co-owners of G.I.F.T. Transportation Services, L.L.C. – a non emergency ambulatory service for the elderly and disabled members of our community.

We are Facilitator Trainers for Basic Training for couples, this is the joint effort of Dr. Rozario Slack and Nisa Islam Muhammad We have joi…

The Family Stone | Mahogany

The Family Stone | Mahogany

The Family Stone
Husband and wife team of Black and Married with dismiss negative notions about marriage and family in Black America. by Arlice Nichole
With an alarming divorce rate in the African American community, higher than that of Whites and Latinos, coupled with a rapidly increasing number of couples who want to call it quits but aren’t able to with the cost of divorce, and because they can’t afford to give up the financial security that the other provides, it’s no surprise that negative attitudes exist about an institution that is supposed to be so very beautiful. But even with these frightening realities regarding marital commitment, the fact is successful Black marriages and families do exist and thrive. And Lamar and Ronnie Tyler, the happily married duo behind the creation of the popular and nationally recognized blog Black and Married with Kids.comproves it! The site has been spotlighted by, The Russ Par Morni…